Calm And Then Chaos

I found myself one night recently, laying sprawled across a mountain of laundry I was “supposed” to be putting away, holding my sore feet in the air while messaging with my sister for Mom life support.

It was not a particularly unusual day here; therapies, appointments, trying to make phone calls with five screeching monkeys in the background, laughter, tears, games, time outs, messes all over the house and not enough Mommy in the day. Some days the day goes exactly the same and I feel on top of it all, some days I feel like I chasing calm all day without ever catching up.

There has been a lot going on in Casa Rudisill and I have been a bad Mommy Blogger when it comes to updating all the people on the interwebs. 😦

Kaitlyn- YAY!!! It is finally coming together!! After over two years we are finally able to make official what has been true for us for years. We have started the paperwork to make Kaitlyn’s adoption official. Now is there some magic law that makes it mandatory she has to live closer than Florida? Ha-Ha. We cannot wait until we get everything finalized and we cannot wait to see her again at Christmas.

Damien- Holy Cow!! He is turning six?! How did this happen?? He has been struggling behavior wise lately but he is also clearly in the middle of a developmental leap and things are always crazy during such times. He is counting down the days until we start school again and showing great progress on his reading.

Perry- Man, he is thriving lately. He is responding so well to the Occupational Therapy and Speech Therapy, I cannot wait to see how things progress when we add in Music Therapy. He is really processing things better and slower lately so he is making less impulse decisions and being safer which is wonderful.

Caleb- We finally found a good fit for Physical Therapy for Caleb. It took a while, almost a year, but Caleb is doing really well with it. He worked so hard at PT this last week he was kind of wobbly on his feet. Unfortunately, he has been incredibly oral lately and both Mommy and Aunt Chaz have sustained some good bites. We are working on it, but it is definitely a work in progress.

Alizé- Oh this diva, it is never dull with her around. Now that she is talking more and more she is showing even more of her hilarious personality. It is so wonderful to be able to have conversations with her. So now, she can tell you when she needs her nails to be “pretty” and when she needs help getting her princess dresses on.

Oliver- Our little monkey is becoming more of a climber and a risk taker as time goes on. He is the one, the one who will give Mommy all white hair before he reaches five years old. He is adding a few more words and gets the tone of how conversations go even if his words do not match he has the rhythm down.

Tyler was able to change to second shift this past week and it has been amazing. It was like I suddenly got my husband back. I knew I had been lonely this last year between him suddenly working third shift and leaving our friends, family, and support system down in the Mid-Atlantic. I had no idea how lonely I had been or how used to managing a lot of kid things myself until Tyler was around so much more and able to share the load. It has made such a difference in life.

For the last few months I have been going through a phase I am calling “religiously bi-polar”. Basically, after non-stop major life change after major life change for about four years straight and pouring every ounce of myself into our miracles, I have completely lost track of who I am. I could not clearly tell you what I believe anymore. To figure that out I have decided to take a step back and explore things and myself and seek out some Spiritual Direction.

Another new change on the horizon is that I have started working with the Charcot-Marie-Tooth Association to start a CMTA Branch for support, education, and to consolidate resources in the area. It is going to be an adventure but I am so excited to get the community gathered and spread awareness.

For now I am seeking out the moments of calm in between the storms of complete chaos.

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